Mamma Bears, Angry Tweets and a Society of No Apologies

My dog and I almost got ran down by a Lady in a Lexus a few weeks ago. We are fine, don't worry. But, what got to me most is was what happened afterward. Let me rewind and say what happened. My dog, Blizzard, and I were on a walk, during the ½ an hour, twice a week where both of my children are at school this year, before summer began. (They are 5 and 3 and go to different preschools.) I was walking by the front entrance of this gated community, where usually the cars coming out of the gate are very careful and concerned about anyone crossing their street. I was looking at my phone cause I had just listened to a voice message, as I crossed the street a Lexus zoomed right across our path, cause the gate was open for this lady and she must have been in a hurry. So I give her the international 'WTF' signal – I shrugged with my hands up. My response (if I were in that situation) would be to show the international 'I'm Sorry' where you show a placating gesture with your hands pushing down, basically the opposite of the WTF signal. Instead, Mrs. Compassion gave me the WTF signal right back. I guess she was pissed that we were in her way. Damn pedestrians!

Last month, my daughter got shoved down by a boy at our church. He was severely abused as a baby and acts out at times, this I understand. What bothered me was his Mother did not apologize for her child's behavior. If my kid had done anything of the sort, the first words out of my mouth would be “I am so sorry.” When I was trying to talk to her on the phone about the situation, her first words were (quite aggressively) “This is (her name)”. I will not bring up her name here, that is not necessary. My point is that she is a Momma Bear, and so am I. She would rather be defensive than apologize. The rest of the conversation did not help either of us, I later sent a letter of apology about hanging up on her, but have not heard anything back. For Momma Bears, sometimes it is hard to find common ground, even if we are just both defending our children.

Bears are scary, just ask Stephen Colbert. The parental instinct is (and should be) very strong, enough for us Mommas to be quite aggressive with others who might harm our children. My son, recently, was rejected from a special speech school for their summer camp, they said he wouldn't fit into their “intensely structured system”. Let's just say that this let out the Momma Bear in me. His behavioral issues were due to his speech delay and they would help him with his speech. You would think they would love to have a 'challenge' for their school, but apparently not. In the two previous instances, I did not talk about those things on social media. But, I could not keep my mouth shut about this preschool, there was an angry tweet, and an angry posting on Facebook. My Sister-In-Law recommended writing a review on yahoo. I did just that. I also wrote to the school, telling them I was shocked that he was rejected and saying that they seemed to want “no challenges, please”. And I will not apologize for this, they did my son wrong. MOMMA BEAR HAS SPOKEN! I was also thinking of writing to politicians, the charity that the school was associated with, and the state regulation of schools. It was decided against, because I know that they have the right to reject a student if they feel he/she would not be a 'good fit' for their school. Private schools are fun that way.

I do feel that our society needs more apologies, when they are necessary. It feels like our culture has been a bit brainwashed by the 'Jerry Springer Types' who as South Park so eloquently mocked with: “I don't care, I do what I want!” Yes, it is good to have strong self-esteem and try not to care what others think. I need to do that more often. But it is sad if you (or your child) does something even close to wrong, and you refuse to apologize. It leaves our world a bit harder to live in for the rest of us.